This may be the hardest blog I've ever written, from my heart it comes and from deep down in the depths of my soul. I write this after much self-searching, soul searching, prayer and meditation. Self-examination.
I wrtie this from MY perspective and from yours. As I look at YOU and you look at me. As WE look at each other.
This writing comes from joy and sadness- mine and yours. It comes from peace and trouble- mine and yours. It comes from kindness and hurt- mine and yours. It comes from healing and pain- mine and yours.
How could you love me?
How could I love you?
How could we love each other?
If I know you then you know me, if you know of me then you know of me. What is the truth? Who is to judge?
If I know YOU then I know you. If I know of you then I know of you. What is the truth? Who is to judge?
We don't live in a world that is impartial. Mostly what we know is or has been influenced, it's been subjected. The information we receive is trivialized or injected. What do we really know and how do we know it?
Many of my friends follow Spiritual Teachers. Some are from the East and some from the West, some are alive and some have passed on. To have the mind of complete impartiality is an astonishing thought, it seems incredible, it seems impossible, AND so it seems.
I wonder what it would be like to answer each question, lovingly. To approach each problem, lovingly. To act and re-act, lovingly. I want to.
I truelly believe my heart has feelings, that your heart has feelings, OUR hearts have feelings.
Maybe there are some folks who don't or can't realize the depth of the HEART emotion and I don't have a real explaination for it. Maybe some folks rely to much on what they think AND instead of letting a thought be a thought - WELL, they don't take their thoughts to heart.
I'm trying to bear my cross with LOVE. I'm trying to bear my crosses with LOVE. I am bearing my crosses with LOVE. That's the only explaination I can give for having made IT thus far. AND I apologize for falling short AND for falling at all.
I apologize for being influenced and sidetracked and injected and misguided and abused and misinformed - mostly all in the name of LOVE. Someone's interpetation of it anyway.
I understand, as well, YOUR being influenced and sidetracked and injected and misguided and abused and misinformed - mostly all in the name of LOVE. Someone's interpetation of it. AND I forgive you for falling short AND for falling at all.
If only Rodney King was sincere. Was he?
I'm reminded of a phrase someone uttered in response to all the madness in the world;
"we've been given a poision pill"
AND poisioned we are, our hearts are, our minds are- where is the LOVE? Where is the unbiased LOVE? Where is the LOVE impartial?
YOU can't CALL it LOVE if it's biased and partial anyway, could you?
It's not our nature to hate, retaliate, accuse or condemn. It's not our nature to manipulate, regulate, horrify or demean. Yet WE do it. WHY? Does it make us happy? What do we accomplish? How does mankind profit from it?
I'm alone but I'm not lonely. I can go for periods without much human contact but not for long because, not me, but my heart needs contact, human contact.
To detach from certain people hurts, especially when we care for them OR care about them AND have had their interest at heart for some time. The process concerning relationships that become turbulent has been twisted and it has been torn and it is destroying,us.
It isn't in our nature to punish, that doesn't come from the heart. That's a mind thing, the business of the mind. Punishing is a bad business to be in, no one really wins. In the end, those who punish get punished and those who've been punished stay punished. You could put it out of your mind BUT you can't remove it from your heart. You see, the mind doesn't bear scars only the heart does.
My heart was almost destroyed on July 26, 2009. It ached bad for a long time. It was attacked twice that day but hate couldn't destroy it. Sadness didn't destroy it. I survived.
What really survived me was LOVE. Love in me and LOVE for me. AND today I write this, out of LOVE and from my heart.
The road to recovery has been long and trying but it's been worth it because out the other side now I can see. I see the truth and the truth has set me free.
We're not as bad as we make each other out to be.
We're not as bad as others make us out to be.
We're not as bad as we thought we were.
We're not as bad as we were.
We're not bad at all.
I close my eyes and venture deep with every breath and beat. There is silence and peace.
I wrtie this from MY perspective and from yours. As I look at YOU and you look at me. As WE look at each other.
This writing comes from joy and sadness- mine and yours. It comes from peace and trouble- mine and yours. It comes from kindness and hurt- mine and yours. It comes from healing and pain- mine and yours.
How could you love me?
How could I love you?
How could we love each other?
If I know you then you know me, if you know of me then you know of me. What is the truth? Who is to judge?
If I know YOU then I know you. If I know of you then I know of you. What is the truth? Who is to judge?
We don't live in a world that is impartial. Mostly what we know is or has been influenced, it's been subjected. The information we receive is trivialized or injected. What do we really know and how do we know it?
Many of my friends follow Spiritual Teachers. Some are from the East and some from the West, some are alive and some have passed on. To have the mind of complete impartiality is an astonishing thought, it seems incredible, it seems impossible, AND so it seems.
I wonder what it would be like to answer each question, lovingly. To approach each problem, lovingly. To act and re-act, lovingly. I want to.
I truelly believe my heart has feelings, that your heart has feelings, OUR hearts have feelings.
Maybe there are some folks who don't or can't realize the depth of the HEART emotion and I don't have a real explaination for it. Maybe some folks rely to much on what they think AND instead of letting a thought be a thought - WELL, they don't take their thoughts to heart.
I'm trying to bear my cross with LOVE. I'm trying to bear my crosses with LOVE. I am bearing my crosses with LOVE. That's the only explaination I can give for having made IT thus far. AND I apologize for falling short AND for falling at all.
I apologize for being influenced and sidetracked and injected and misguided and abused and misinformed - mostly all in the name of LOVE. Someone's interpetation of it anyway.
I understand, as well, YOUR being influenced and sidetracked and injected and misguided and abused and misinformed - mostly all in the name of LOVE. Someone's interpetation of it. AND I forgive you for falling short AND for falling at all.
If only Rodney King was sincere. Was he?
I'm reminded of a phrase someone uttered in response to all the madness in the world;
"we've been given a poision pill"
AND poisioned we are, our hearts are, our minds are- where is the LOVE? Where is the unbiased LOVE? Where is the LOVE impartial?
YOU can't CALL it LOVE if it's biased and partial anyway, could you?
It's not our nature to hate, retaliate, accuse or condemn. It's not our nature to manipulate, regulate, horrify or demean. Yet WE do it. WHY? Does it make us happy? What do we accomplish? How does mankind profit from it?
I'm alone but I'm not lonely. I can go for periods without much human contact but not for long because, not me, but my heart needs contact, human contact.
To detach from certain people hurts, especially when we care for them OR care about them AND have had their interest at heart for some time. The process concerning relationships that become turbulent has been twisted and it has been torn and it is destroying,us.
It isn't in our nature to punish, that doesn't come from the heart. That's a mind thing, the business of the mind. Punishing is a bad business to be in, no one really wins. In the end, those who punish get punished and those who've been punished stay punished. You could put it out of your mind BUT you can't remove it from your heart. You see, the mind doesn't bear scars only the heart does.
My heart was almost destroyed on July 26, 2009. It ached bad for a long time. It was attacked twice that day but hate couldn't destroy it. Sadness didn't destroy it. I survived.
What really survived me was LOVE. Love in me and LOVE for me. AND today I write this, out of LOVE and from my heart.
The road to recovery has been long and trying but it's been worth it because out the other side now I can see. I see the truth and the truth has set me free.
We're not as bad as we make each other out to be.
We're not as bad as others make us out to be.
We're not as bad as we thought we were.
We're not as bad as we were.
We're not bad at all.
I close my eyes and venture deep with every breath and beat. There is silence and peace.
No comments:
Post a Comment