I want to talk about a formula for peace of mind. And not just peace of mind but a formula for a healthy soul and a vibrant beating heart.
I would very much like to discuss the matter of confessing. I'm not talking about going into a booth, stating the facts as they appear to be and leaving with some confidence that the penance your about to recite will erase the motivation to fall into temptation again, to miss the mark in the future, to sin somewhere down the road all of which disturbs the order of things.
I mean a solid one to one, eye to eye honest appraisal with someone whose counsel you trust and the type of person who does not indict you but is polite and compassionate.
The longer the conversation, the more likely there will be a verdict, maybe several and once that judgement is made - the assessment of the conversation, an opinion will be rendered by the listener but you must walk away feeling acquitted and not sentenced!
Acquitted, not sentenced because chances are that by the time you sit down with your confidant you already feel guilty AND no-one needs to pronounce this.
Failure to confess our errors, our misfortunes or our mistakes often leads to more self-harm and and injury to others. And when I say
" harm " I use the word with much discretion,good judgement.
Failure to confess ensures the continued walk on a dangerous path of subconcious frustration and acting out often times without thought of the consequences because when we're knee deep in the thick of the misguided and disproportioned activity we cannot and will not think sensibly or accurately.
These mental emotional " black outs " can easily be critiqued with malice and unwarranted criticism by those around us especially if intoxicants were added to the mix. What may not make sense to another person makes sense to you and me provided we have had the same misfortune and infamy.
We know the continued shame and disgrace and as a matter of fact this shame and disgrace often extends the confusing behavior OR adds to it. The unconcious abyss seems never ending and the more we fall the more we fall.
I cannot tell you however to often of the rewards of confessing to a trustworthy person. And not only is trustworthiness paramount but as I mentioned earlier the feedback needs to be constructive, not destructive. Positive not negative. Uplifitng not belittling.
We embark on each days journey seeking the approval of others - it's a birthright. And that approval may come from an unsuspected social tyrant who seeks out the weak and the sensitive. He or she will manipulate another individual and cause great injury, maybe eternal injury but now it's too late for some. Some never return to us as they left.
A fracture occurs in the embodiment of all that is good in these people, people whose life experiences up to this point have been intoxicating and they surrender to the inevitable mental and emotional anguish if only we could be released from this perverted form of approval.
We succumb to the distress and to whom could we explain this misery especially if the person be someone who daily gives us positive approval? How would we tell them, how would we begin to tell them?
And so we look for a " closed mouth " friend ( if I may repeat a line from the A.A. literature ) but I tell you this person must be more than closed mouthed! May I suggest someone with a closed mouth and an open mind then.
Not most of us experience the same path along the way and so the advice we recieve from someone NOT familiar with our deficiencies must be compellingly postive and of an unbiased nature. Lives hang in the balance in some cases!
And so I say to you, the one who is weighed down by the unsweeming endless parade of mistakes to please muster some much needed courage and seek out an individual with whom you can share your ex-periences but also to find a person whose reputation is of the caliber that he or she will undoubtedly help carry your burden.
papajohn ~ shaman ~
I would very much like to discuss the matter of confessing. I'm not talking about going into a booth, stating the facts as they appear to be and leaving with some confidence that the penance your about to recite will erase the motivation to fall into temptation again, to miss the mark in the future, to sin somewhere down the road all of which disturbs the order of things.
I mean a solid one to one, eye to eye honest appraisal with someone whose counsel you trust and the type of person who does not indict you but is polite and compassionate.
The longer the conversation, the more likely there will be a verdict, maybe several and once that judgement is made - the assessment of the conversation, an opinion will be rendered by the listener but you must walk away feeling acquitted and not sentenced!
Acquitted, not sentenced because chances are that by the time you sit down with your confidant you already feel guilty AND no-one needs to pronounce this.
Failure to confess our errors, our misfortunes or our mistakes often leads to more self-harm and and injury to others. And when I say
" harm " I use the word with much discretion,good judgement.
Failure to confess ensures the continued walk on a dangerous path of subconcious frustration and acting out often times without thought of the consequences because when we're knee deep in the thick of the misguided and disproportioned activity we cannot and will not think sensibly or accurately.
These mental emotional " black outs " can easily be critiqued with malice and unwarranted criticism by those around us especially if intoxicants were added to the mix. What may not make sense to another person makes sense to you and me provided we have had the same misfortune and infamy.
We know the continued shame and disgrace and as a matter of fact this shame and disgrace often extends the confusing behavior OR adds to it. The unconcious abyss seems never ending and the more we fall the more we fall.
I cannot tell you however to often of the rewards of confessing to a trustworthy person. And not only is trustworthiness paramount but as I mentioned earlier the feedback needs to be constructive, not destructive. Positive not negative. Uplifitng not belittling.
We embark on each days journey seeking the approval of others - it's a birthright. And that approval may come from an unsuspected social tyrant who seeks out the weak and the sensitive. He or she will manipulate another individual and cause great injury, maybe eternal injury but now it's too late for some. Some never return to us as they left.
A fracture occurs in the embodiment of all that is good in these people, people whose life experiences up to this point have been intoxicating and they surrender to the inevitable mental and emotional anguish if only we could be released from this perverted form of approval.
We succumb to the distress and to whom could we explain this misery especially if the person be someone who daily gives us positive approval? How would we tell them, how would we begin to tell them?
And so we look for a " closed mouth " friend ( if I may repeat a line from the A.A. literature ) but I tell you this person must be more than closed mouthed! May I suggest someone with a closed mouth and an open mind then.
Not most of us experience the same path along the way and so the advice we recieve from someone NOT familiar with our deficiencies must be compellingly postive and of an unbiased nature. Lives hang in the balance in some cases!
And so I say to you, the one who is weighed down by the unsweeming endless parade of mistakes to please muster some much needed courage and seek out an individual with whom you can share your ex-periences but also to find a person whose reputation is of the caliber that he or she will undoubtedly help carry your burden.
papajohn ~ shaman ~
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